Saturday, August 14, 2010

The words we never say...

For all that I am a great advocate of humanity and make a big fuss over people's individual uniqueness--the visit to Auschwitz being my great epiphany on the value of life--lately I had been growing a bit cynical in regards to some people that surround me.

Some of my friends, those closer to my heart, behaved in ways that both hurt and betrayed my trust in them. None of them did it on purpose, and I am sure, part of the misunderstandings were also my fault.
Yet I was so dissillusioned by the turn of events, that I withdrew myself from their company and decided they were not "worthy" of my time and friendship.

Needless to say, the light in my life grew a little bit dimmer; for when we shut the door to leave the world out, part of the beauty of living stays out as well.

During that time I befriended a young musician, and his presence in my life brought back the sunshine, chasing all my shadows away. Perhaps the one significant element of this friendship was the knowledge of its imminent culmination. Every moment together was fleetingly precious--here for an instant, gone in the next interval.

It made me realize, thankfully not to late, that I don't have time to hold a grudge against someone who I think did me wrong. When all is said and done, the things that matter are not who was right or not, not who was to blame. Very much the way a man who has only 3 more months to live, would hardly make an issue of a mere triviality, when time is running out.

So often we leave to the end the words we should say at the beginning. Many times we never get to say them. Too often we think ourselves immortal, and we leave for after, the things that should be done now. But what if there was no after? what if this moment is all we had? what if this is the last time we could say the words we never say? wouldn't we say them? Perhaps even shout them from the rooftops, so that those whom we love will not have the shadow of a doubt that they are important to us!

This happy revelation came to me thanks to the time spent with this wonderful friend of mine, who means the world to me! :)

Because our time on earth is transitory, I want you to know that I love you!

PS: to Nell, KRJ, and Johnny M.